Sunday, 12 June 2016

Six Years

I've never believed in love at first sight. I never used to believe people when they would say that when you meet 'the one' you just know. It all seemed rather silly to me, that you could lock eyes with someone and suddenly be drawn to them and know that they are the one for you.

Until it happened to me.

I was 23, living with my boyfriend and throwing myself into work. I loved my job - it felt like my happy place, because things weren't particularly good at home. I fit in there, I had friends I could confide in, have nights out with and have fun with. In April 2010, our department recruited another four staff to join the team. On the walk around during the induction, my manager at the time noticed one of the lads who was starting. He was tall, very stocky, lots of piercings and tattoos, built like a rugby player (we later found out he was), I didn't notice him. I noticed the other guy - the one who was quieter, more reserved, not as in your face. I didn't really pay too much attention because, whilst not in a happy relationship, I was in one and we owned a house together. Life was pretty stressful back then - my ex had just lost his second job and I was the breadwinner and working 12 hour shifts to keep a roof over our head (at 23 years old). It was hard.

Over the next couple of weeks, the new guys came sitting listening in to calls and this one particular day, I locked eyes with Michael. I instigated a conversation and something happened to me. I felt this pull. Like I just HAD to get to know him. I am quite a shy person and I'm not very good at instigating conversations or putting myself out there, but this was different. I started to really make an effort to talk to him, to find out how his day had been and how he was getting on, as he did with me. Before long, we had become firm friends, emailing back and forth, which then turned into facebook messaging and before long texting and chatting on the phone and a few times he'd even come round for tea, when my ex was at work (My ex had known about this). I wanted to know everything about him, and we'd find ourselves chatting for hours in the evening's and there was not one single thing I didn't like about him.

It was soon coming up to my 24th birthday and we'd had a big department night out planned as quite a lot of birthday's were in May. It'd had been planned for weeks and I was so happy when Michael said he would love to come when I invited him.

That was the night which changed everything. I admitted to him what I'd known for a while - I had fallen head over heels for him. There was no denying it, I was besotted. I ended up confessing this to him after a few drinks and I was both surprised and relieved when he told me he'd felt the same. He'd not acted on it because of my situation and had told himself it was better to have me as a friend than nothing at all. I knew I had to officially end my relationship. I say officially because in my heart it had been over for a long time as we'd become two people living in the same house. We were also working opposite shifts, so rarely saw each other in the week which made it really difficult to sit down face to face and end things. When the day came, I think my ex knew because he prompted the conversation and asked was it over. I think we both knew that the relationship had run it's course. I wasn't happy. In fact, I was pretty damn miserable, as was he and it wasn't healthy to argue the amount we did. I also felt like there was too much pressure on me to keep a roof over our head and be working such long hours at 23. There was no fun in the relationship, we didn't do anything or go anywhere together and for a young couple, alarm bells were ringing. Once I ended it, I felt such a relief. Like I could be me again. When you have spent over a year, being so unhappy, it really takes it's toll. With Michael, he had shown me that not only could I be happy, but I also deserved to be happy.

Michael and I became a couple two days after I ended my relationship, which I agree, is very quick, but it goes back to that saying of 'when you know, you know'.  My family didn't approve of my new relationship happening so fast and I was actually with Michael for six months before they met him. I'm not going to lie, that was hard, but I did understand their reasoning. They've definitely made up for it now and he's very much part of the family.

I am so happy that Michael came into my life when he did. I knew from our very first conversation that he was different. I still don't necessarily believe in love at first sight, but there was definitely something with Michael. An attraction, this feeling that I HAD to get to know him, like we were supposed to meet when we did. Our paths had actually crossed for a couple of years before meeting - just things like he used to work with a lot of my friends from school  so we knew a lot of the same people and he lived with one of them in the same apartment block where my Dad's Nan lived... I do believe in fate, and I really believe that we were meant to be.

Three months after getting together, he went away on a lads holiday and it was the longest two weeks EVER! Once he returned, I pretty much moved into his parents house - I had a great relationship with them from very early on, and six months after we'd become a couple, we got our own apartment and moved in together in December 2010 - just in time for Christmas.

Within nine months we were engaged in March 2011 (the sneaky thing proposed to me on his birthday) and by January 2012 I was pregnant with Alfie, who arrived in September 2012. We were married in August 2012 and in February 2016, we found out we were pregnant again and our second little baby will join us at the end of October / early November.

Things moved pretty quickly for us in those early years, but it just always felt right. He is the most amazing Husband and Daddy and I feel incredibly lucky that I get to share this crazy journey with him. There is nobody else in the world I would rather have by my side. For six years, he's been my absolute rock, my partner in crime, my best friend and the person who makes me laugh like no other.

I count my blessing every day that I get to be his wife.


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